Wisdom of MY Words

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26 July
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American Health Insurance

In October 1983 I turned 18. My mother was a teacher, no longer at Custer, but we’d run her out of the North Shore. She’d moved to the City of Milwaukee. They had a rule or a law that said that teachers who lived in the city could not move out of it if they wanted to continue working for the Milwaukee Public Schools (MPS). My mother had stayed in Fox Point. In 1981 I moved to my grandparent’s home on 7505 Links Way. My mother and her GF moved to the city. I’d been born on Monday and it was a Monday I turned legal majority. My mother showed up at school and met with Dr. Irwin. I didn’t know anything until I was walking dow the B wing and I heard several teachers whispering about Margaret Davis and her “poor daughter.”

I was on the smart kid plan, or at least the organized teen plan. I had 4 classes and they ended at 12. Then I walked over to Mister Winch’s to balance his accounts in a small leather bound ledger, like Scrouge, or Bartleby the Scrivener. A piano tuner’s house in Glendale. 2 blocks from Nana Davis’ house. On Christmas Eve Mr. Winch, much older than I with gray hair and a grey beard, rang the doorbell. He was looking perplexed, shocked, kind stunned as he stood there holding roses the color of blood and a plane ticket to some far off warm destination. While I was 18, I wasn’t very mature and my boyfriend was only 16. Neither of us knew how to deal with a clearly older man that wanted me to be in love with him.

I see his face in my head. He was close to tears when Nana Davis said to him, her shrill soprano wafting across Lake Drive down to the lake, “She’s only 18. She’s still in high school. What are you thinking? You want to take my grand daughter to South America? Are you insane?”

Stephan was cruel. He was a nice boy, smart, and as that song goes, “Boys with small talk and small minds really don’t impress me in bed,” but he was kid. At least more of a kid than I was, even though at the time I saw him as worldly and wanted to spend the rest of my life with him. He was my 6th grade crush all over again. Bill Frack. Dreamy. He looked like John Kennedy.

22 July
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08 July
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08 July 2017 – Cannabis Oil Journey

I am so so sorry. I am 59 years old and have a brain tumor but I think i will make it.

I have thought about dying a lot. In fact I thought about it so much that I figured out that it will happen now or later and for some reason I have become ok with that.

Instead of thinking of the death as being sad, I finally was able to think of it as my goal, I have completed it. Now of course I can understand how thats a very hard way to think but to me the fact is true, and more than likely the fact is true for you also.

I don’t think about the pain and what all of this is doing to me, because I’m not a doctor thats not my job, the doctor is doing his best to do his job and keep me going so i don’t look at that anymore.

What I do think about however is all of the people I have meant in my life and all of the happiness I have had, and even the things that where so screwed up are now past and everything is alright now. I think about all of the men i did different things with and all of the women that i have meant in my life and the happiness I have had.

Remember dear that the doctors goal is to do his best for you. There is nothing we can do about this except do exactly what he wants us to do. Thats all. We can not help him in this matter except do what he says, and we will do it, but remember we are not the doctors and they will do there best.

Instead think about everything else that you have been though. Has there been someone that you haven’t seen in years and years that you can look up on facebook and say hello too. If you ever had big huge arguements with them, don’t contact them, who cares. Only people that may welcome a hello. Is the best band in your life playing somewhere, have you man take you to see it.

Death is so very funny, and so very close. Even though i may not look at god as everyone else does, i do realize that this is just a miracle that we where able to do this. i mean, its amazing, me and you talking right now, the whole entire everything being able to be alive and breath for so many years. We as humans have had a wonderful gift, no no no, it’s way way more than a gift, it’s a word that hasn’t even been made up yet.. wonderful, peaceful, incredible, when we look into the planets around us, we have had everything. We are so lucky we have time to talk..

It may be over, but Im so glad i participated, and glad i meant you.. Good night and have the sweetest lovelyist dreams.. xoxoxo

08 July
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08 July 2017 – Cannabis Oil Journey

I’m on the back end of knowing better, hearing the advice from others since breast cancer in 2013, but now here I am. Lazy. I know that exercise is good for me. I know that I like being toned instead of flabby, but I’m so damn tired and can’t get the energy together to join a health club. I hesitate to do anything that causes Juan to have to pause what he iOS doing and schlepp me somewhere. I don’t want to have to nag him to take me anywhere, not even take me for a walk and hold my hand, because I need independence for my mental health.

I’d rather read than exercise, but admit that confronted with death of exercise for one hour every day, I’ll choose exercise. Small price to pay. I told Juan at brunch that I feel like I have to pay for all my relatives living into their 90s. I was only half kidding.

24 June
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24 June 2017 – Cannabis Oil Journey

I’m reading Patricia Raybon, and I agree, I hate white people too. I probably shouldn’t have read all those books about classe. Guffaw. Or those books about the slave trade and killing Indians.
“And white people had killed 6 million Semites and enslaved 15 million blacks (and sacrificed 30 million more, some say, to make the passage), and they had broken 400 treaties and irradiated islands and deserts and seas and even people. And they had robbed treasures. And they had reduced by 9 million through death and disease and denial the Iroquois and the Mohawk and the Pequot and the Oneida and the Seneca and the Arapaho and the Navajo and the Cherokee and the Ute and the other Indian populations in North America to a remnant of barely 1 million. And white people had stolen land wealth and ideas and music and inventions, and broken promises and backs and treatises and will, and white people had stolen HOPE. And I hated white people for all of it.”
—My First White Friend: Confessions on Race, Love, and Forgiveness by Patricia Raybon.

I hate white people because the Senate is looking at cutting my ridiculously overpriced health insurance. But if we don’t get health insurance we are charged way more than people who have insurance. This is because deals have been made. An MRI costs $1400, without contrast. If you do a contrast and no-contrast it’s $2500. Health insurance buys down your expense. Let’s say your deductible is 5 thousand dollars. If you have insurance your bill is covered at an Allowable Rate.

Let’s say the insurance company negotiated for MRI cost to be $1000. That means the MRI provider takes a 4 hundred dollar hit. Then the insurance company pays your portion, and you owe the reminder. For my MRI I owe $900, but if you didn’t have ANY insurance you’d owe the full $1400. The great majority of Americans have insurance so the only people getting fucked are small business owners and anyone that doesn’t have insurance through your employer.

Health insurance costs is a way to keep your population trapped. Americans are trapped. They are trapped in the city they live in because now their health insurance is tied to their home state. For me, if I wanted to move to Denver I’d have to apply for Medicaid in order to not have crippling debt.

12 June
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07 June 2017 – Cannabis Oil Journey

Another day at the salt mines. Tired, very lethargic, depressed or feeling low, some diarrhea  within an hour of ingesting CBD oil. Reading even more about diet, exercise, and herbals and what I need to change, or implement. We went to a Korean Market on 77th/Portland in Richfield. They were supposed to have fruit like Goji Berries and Soursop. They had dried packaged Goji Berries which are gross. They had Soursop sodas, basically the juice with water; but they don’t label it like a juice. It just says Soursop and a picture of three green fruit that resembles are more benevolent Arizona  cactus.

09 February
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Kathy Wolford Davis

Here’s Missy Davis’s gas lighting for the past, um, seven or eight years. Roger encouraged me to join Ancestry, saying that it would be helpful to connect with family, and make sense of their crazy.

As an only child who didn’t meet her father until she was 35, and was raised by a group of old people while my single lesbian mother was off working or traveling or having sex, I thought hell, that’s all I’ve ever wanted was family,let’s do this!

I met Dawn, and she’s great, and Arlene, and then there is the Pryzbylinski’s side, w of, and we’ve only just met, so there are possibilities.

However, the thing that has been eating me alive for almost three years is Jon’s aunt Kathy Davis refusing to tell me how she is related to my family. Her Ancestry chart is FILLED to the brim with people she doesn’t know! Dick Bilda. Packer player, wearing his Super Bowl ring; alwys fighting with Uncle Gerry. Three pack a day Aunt Dorothy, or the insult of insults, calling Nana Davis “Margie.” OMG, that’s too much! Nana would pick up that phone and have a few choice words to say to Cathy Wolford Davis about having the gall to call her Margie.

Marg, Marge or Margaret, but never ever Margie, or Peg.

Since my headaches are getting worse, and all I pray for every day is that I can stay mortal long enough to finish all my writing, and make it to England in April 2017, my only other request is can someone, specifically you Cathy Davis, have some common courtesy and tell me how you and I are related? And if we aren’t, which is what my MILs mantra has been for over a decade, then why do you have MY Wolski relatives on your chart? Are you a Wolski? Are, as Jon said, the Wolski’s related to the Wolford’s and Jon’s been in an incestuous relationship with his cousin, me, for 22 years?

01 February
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Mandated Child Support

June 21, 2002

Hennepin County DC246637
Ref: Michele Davis

To Whom It May Concern:

Michele has had a successful career as a contract-consulting writer for software companies, being compensated well until last year when she was unemployed for seven months. Now, in 2002 she has not had consistent employment and has struggled financially. Although, in my opinion, Michele has always been frugal and managed money well as she buys all clothing for her family second-hand, and most home items as well, yet she has struggled because her and her children’s standard of living has changed.

When Michele and David Meyer, settled upon a child support amount, David’s lawyer requested our tax returns, and based David’s less than Minnesota’s recommended percentage amount of support on Michele’s income. We agreed to this at the time to get the process completed, but were not fully pleased with the way the situation was manipulated in David’s favor, and against his children’s.

Currently, I am the major provider for the household including Michele, Zachery, Simon and Miriam. I’m not begrudging as I willingly took on this role but given Michele’s unemployment David’s support isn’t enough to adequately support the children. As I stated above we are frugal. We buy most of our clothing second hand or at discount stores. We’ve joined a farm-share to get produce at a discount over the summer. We don’t buy what we can’t afford.

We are watching as friends and family are laid off. A friend of ours was just let go from a technology job last week. He had worked for this employer for 12 years. My father-in-law’s company went from 155 employees in January 2002, to 45 in June 2002, and he fears he may be out of a job soon.

My company is shutting down from July 1st to July 7th to compensate for the weak economy. It saves manufacturers more money to shutdown a plant for a week than to layoff employees. I have to either use vacation days or lose income for that week. Additionally, there have been recent layoffs and I have no job security because my department is going to be moved to Marshalltown, Iowa before the end of the year 2002. Which means, I too, will be among the many unemployed.

Michele has been working very hard to find employment. She’s placed ads for work. She’s being very flexible. She volunteers her skills as a writer for her children’s school while looking for work. And currently, she’s accepted a part-time retail position, but her hands are tied because the Modification of Divorce Decree did not allow a provision for daycare for Simon and Miriam if Michele would take a full-time position, therefore she would be saddled with the daycare costs of both Simon and Miriam if she were to work more than part-time.

Because of our financial position we cannot send the kids to the Summer Arts camp at St. Paul Academy, which Simon had gone to for 9 consecutive summers and Miriam for 4 consecutive summers. We cannot afford to send the kids to the YMCA camps that they went to last summer. We cannot afford to send Simon to Cello lessons, or Boy Scouts. The kids lose out because of the limited support. When Michele has attempted to ask for some additional funds from David his response has been threatening, telling her that if she can’t “financially support the kids, then a different arrangement should be made.”

Michele is an excellent mother, home every day after school for both Simon and Miriam, spending all her free time doing homework, reading, and playing with her children. It seems a sad state of affairs that Simon and Miriam have to suffer financially because the Modification of Divorce Decree does not allot the maximum mandated child support from the children’s father.

Sincerely,

Jon A. Phillips

01 February
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Such a Big Deal About Haircuts!

27 September 2002

To Whom it May Concern:

I, Nicci Shidla, am Miriam Davis’ hairstylist. I work at Hair Police, and have come from a hair styling family. My father is co-owner of Kent Here for Hair in Linden Hills. I have attended Beauty School, and have my license. I have cut Miriam Davis and Simon Meyer’s hair for two years, prior to that another Hair Police associate, Stef, cut Miriam and Simon’s hair. Their mother, Michele Davis, has been coming to Hair Police since college.

Michele cut Miriam’s bangs, because she was unable to get an appointment with me. But I did tell her that she did a good job. As soon as my next appointment was available, Miriam came in to get a trim. I can also verify that what Mr. Meyer claims is a “mullet” on Miriam, is not. She has a typical young girls haircut, which is layered and face framing.

A mullet haircut is short in the front, and short around the ears (approximately two inches or shorter) and long in the back (shoulder length or longer.) This is called, jokingly, “Nothing up front and all the business in the back.” Miriam, most certainly does not have a haircut like that.

In addition, Michele or her husband Jon, regularly bring Simon and Miriam and occasionally Zack in for haircuts. I see Simon and Miriam approximately every 8-10 weeks. Michele allows the children to dictate their own haircuts, within reason, and always adequately parents them when they are in the salon waiting for the other child to finish getting their haircut. They are both well-behaved, and Simon and I have a good rapport as we talk about music, video games and the life of an 11 year old boy. They are delightful children.

31 January
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My ExHusband is From Hell

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Michele-

I’ve been blessed that I’m able to pay you $2,280 for
Simon’s braces and $146 for Simon and Mimi Jan/Feb dental=20
bill on September 1. Let me know, if you’re interested.

David